Seven Quick Takes

Molly has asked me to write this post.  I have never written this type of post before, so please forgive me if it doesn’t quite work for you.  I promise I will try my best.

1. Yesterday was our anniversary.  We’re approaching our 5 year anniversary.  This anniversary we celebrated by going to work.  Next year, we’re going to Las Vegas.

2. We’re actually celebrating tonight and going to a restaurant called the Grey Moss Inn.  I got one of those “Today only” coupons for the place.  I’m excited, not because it is supposed to have good steak, but because it’s haunted.

They talk a lot about seeing “Orbs”.  I think orbs are the most over-rated ways to spot a ghost.  If I want to see a ghost, I’ll want to see stuff flying off the walls and old ladies in rocking chairs humming “Glory Glory Hallelujah”.

3. I have created a new blog design here.  Surprised no one really commented on it… I mean it’s pretty much the cutest blog background in the world.

4. Don’t forget to check out Jack’s blog: 365junior.blogspot.com   My goal was to take a picture everyday of his first year.  That’s a lot harder than it sounds.  When you first have a baby, it’s easy to remember.  Then you get exhausted, and tired, and you move into a new house and there are gaps.  Overall though, I’ve done pretty good… just going a few days at the longest without snapping at least one picture.

5.  Does Jack not have one of the cutest smiles in the world?
He’s cute.  His new favorite thing is to be on the ground and you stand above him and just laugh.  It’s apparently one of the funniest things in the entire history of the human race.

6. Jack is sleeping on his side and his stomach a lot.  We put him down on his back and he flips over.  After all the SIDS people scared us to death, it’s tough to accept his preferred sleeping position.  There’s not much we can do.  I just wish someone would say, “It’s absolutely okay.  Nothing will happen.”  However, you look at resources and it says something to the affect, “If your child rolls over onto his tummy, there isn’t much you can do.  However, we suggest you continue putting him or her to sleep on their back as it is the safest.  For kids that sleep on their tummy, there’s an increased risk of SIDS.”  What the heck?  How is that supposed to make me feel better?!?

7. I got Starcraft 2 in the mail yesterday.  It’s perhaps the best sequel to the best video game in the world.  Did you know a guy died because he played Starcraft 2 straight for 50+ hours.  He died!  It was in South Korea.  They love their Starcraft in South Korea.  Did you know they have 2 tv stations devoted to Starcraft?!?  Amazing.

8.  Monday is August.  Wait. What?  There’s only supposed to be 7 quick things?!  DANG IT!  I knew I’d mess this up.

Ten on Thursday

Because I forgot to post it on Tuesday. But I wrote it. So you have to read it. Blog law.

1. How do you take your coffee on an average day? How do you like your
coffee if you’re splurging?
Strong. Very strong. And black. My mother in law makes coffee that tastes like
espresso. I always had to add water to it. Now that I have a baby, I
see why: PARENTS NEED STRONG COFFEE. I drink espresso every morning
now. Thank you,boss, for putting my office next to the Executive Break
Room and the fancy coffee machine.If I am splurging, I want a soy
nonfat latte. Or a skinny cinnamon dolce latte. Or a dry nonfat
cappuccino. Mmm...now I want starbucks.

2. What is your genre of books to read?
Umm...er...I don't really read anymore. If I do, it's Christian books.
But really, I don't read much. Unless we’re talking contracts. I read lots and lots of contracts.

3. Where do you want to retire, if you could go anywhere?
I agree with Chelsea on this one: close to family. Although preferably
far away from the cold.

4. The 17-year-old you is told to write a 10-minute speech. What topic
would you have picked?
I was a freshman in college at 17. So probably I'd have picked a topic
about homesickness. Because I was oh so very homesick. Until I met
this handsome boy named John. Then I got over my homesickness REAL
fast.

5. What word describes you best?
Grateful.

6. What is the next “event” that you are looking forward to? (ex.:
vacation, moving, date, job change, etc)
Hmm...that's a good question. I guess the holidays? It means time off,
right? Honestly, I can’t think of any “event” I am really looking forward to. I am sticking with the holidays…it means time off and family will be visiting. Except for my brother and sister-in-law WHO SHOULD BE visiting but won’t be. Why? I’ll tell you why. Remember this blog post? CLICK HERE and read all about my adorable nephew, Liam. or CLICK HERE to see him even cuter! Yeah, Liam is going to be a big brother to the first McCartney granddaughter in November. And so that means no brother and sister-in-law for the holidays. Sad.

But that’s just one more thing to look forward to with the holidays, right? So yeah, that’s my vote.

7. Do you like to discuss controversial topics or do you prefer to
avoid those types of conversations?
Hate it. HATE it. I don’t want to talk about anything that makes me get inner rage. And controversial topics usually do.

8. Would you rather add 4 free hours to each day, or add 1 extra day
to the week?
1 extra day. If I had four hours, I would definitely spend them
working. If there was one additional weekend day though, I'd have an
easier time putting down the blackberry. It's normal to work into all
hours of the night in my job. It's less normal to work on the weekends
so I feel like I can usually get away with not checking emails/doing
work.

9. If you created a sports team; what would your colors and mascot be?
Yellow and black. The bumblebees. I don't know what we'd be but we'd
be the bumblebees and probably get our butts kicked by someone like
the Colt .45s. Because Bullets beat Bees.

10. If you had to be a teacher, what subject would you teach?
Law. Oh how I would love to be a law professor. UCC classes. But all
the students would hate those (except me and Amanda and Meggie) so
maybe I'd want to teach torts. Because everyone likes torts. Or Crim
Law. Basically I'd want to teach the law that I don't practice...my
law practice is too boring. Nobody wants to take UCC or Insurance law. Man, this blog sure makes my life look glamorous, huh? I feel bad for the poor law student who stumbles across it and sees what being a lawyer is all about: lame blog posts and boring contracts. Eh, oh well. Just look forward to that beautiful student debt, little law student! Life is GOOD!

Happy Anniversary!

To the best husband a girl could ask for.

What Happens in Vegas…is Actually Pretty Uneventful

Here I am sitting in the Las Vegas airport (or at least I was when I wrote this post) waiting for my flight back home to my boys. The excitement of this airport gate is about the same excitement of my entire trip. The most scandalous thing about my trip was when the TSA woman pulled me aside to inform me that a button on my shirt had popped open in a most scandalous spot. I know, I'm crazy!!!

I got here Wednesday afternoon and sat in my hotel room at the Encore responding to emails and, what else, writing and reviewing contracts. I was starving by 5:00 pm and after reviewing all the nearby restaurants, determined that I didn't feel like eating alone in a 5 star restaurant while surrounded by lovey dovey couples. Plus, I didn't think my boss would appreciate me expensing a $150 dinner. So i decided to order room service instead...because that would be cheaper, right? So instead of paying upwards of $100 for an amazing meal, I spent $60 on a subpar room service salad and pasta. I think the room service lady expected to see an 80 year old woman when she knocked on the door to deliver it...at 5:30 pm. Listen!!! It was 7:30 San Antonio time!!! I took my first bubble bath since the day my water broke and went to bed at 7:30. Not ashamed. You'd think I'd have slept like a baby in that giant bed all by myself. And I did. The problem? I slept like MY baby...the one who wakes up 6 times a night. I didn't realize how often I wake up to make sure he is breathing until I was 1000 miles away from him and couldn't just peek over to check. Hello neurotic!! And I wonder why jack is so high strung?

Anyway, the next day was filled with seminars about the joys of being an insurance in house attorney. But the night!! The one thing I was actually looking forward to in Vegas: the buffet! My boss and I decided to put the "sin" in "sin city" went to the buffet at the Aria where I ate a gluttonous amount of crab legs, Indian food, sushi, mussels, and leg of lamb. Oh, and these horseradish potato things....and shot glasses filled with tiny little salads, desserts, and ceviche. Tell me how it is acceptable to eat such a freakishly strange, disconnected assortment of food at a buffet? If I went to a restaurant and ordered crab legs with naan and mint chutney, I'd get very strange stares. Yet it works so well if it's all laid out assembly-line fashion. And get this....the entire ocean of seafood that I consumed was half the price of my room service boring pasta and salad. I can only imagine the damage I could have done at that buffet if I wasn't trying to be ladylike around my boss. I already told her I was going to punch her in the face...I'm on thin ice here, people!

At the urging of Chelsea, I stuck a $20 in the slot machine on my way out of the Aria. My only requirement was that I did a machine with a lever. None of this push the button crap for me. I wanted some old school lever pulling. I won $6 after about 2 minutes. The guy next to me won $100 and blew it all in literally a minute. I decided if I won more than $10, I'd walk away. After about 5 minutes, I was up $4 and tired. So I cashed out my big winnings in anticipation of buying half of a drink and left.

I got back to the hotel and talked to my baby sister who was camping just a couple hours away from me. I miss her and it was depressing to be so close yet so far away from her.She will reach her destination of San Francisco in just a few short days. They are still short of their team fundraising goal so if you haven't donated yet, please consider it. http://www.biketheusforms.org/cyclists/detail_full.asp?c=Bridget_McCartney 

Friday was more seminars and sneaking out to catch my flight. And now I sit here watching people lose money at the airport slot machines.  Like probably most everyone here, I have a terrible headache. The only difference is that I only had one adult beverage in my entire time in Las Vegas. So I have a hunch that my headache may have a different stressor behind it than the rest of these more exciting people.

So there ya have it... What happens in Vegas goes on the interwebs for all the world to read. I bet you wish it'd have stayed in Vegas so you could have these last 5 minutes of your life back. Well tough! Now off to find out how to invest my big winnings into a CD. Or maybe into that machine calling me with it's siren song of, "WHEEL. OF. FORTUNE!!!!!"

Hidee Ho Neighbor!

I think I should have lived in the fifties. There. I said it. I just don’t think these 21st century people are my kind of peeps. These people who are too busy twittering and blogging and playing tennis on the television with a little white wand. I need people who do things June Cleaver style with good old fashioned thank-you notes and pies cooling on the windowsill. I never really realized this until we moved into our new house. I mean, I knew that I was a thank-you note “nazi” if you will.  I write thank you notes like my Grandma Miller taught me. I get very unhappy if I don’t get a thank you note. Not because I think that I am entitled to one. Just because I think that a little bit of civility dies every time one is failed to be sent out. I guess I also knew that little boys should wear cute Jon-Jons. But besides my hatred for unresponded to gifts and boys who don’t wear good old fashioned clothing, I am just a good old 21st century girl, right?

When we moved into the house, we unpacked so fast and got everything just so. All in anticipation for that first visitor! I just knew that any minute, there would be a knock on the door and there would be our new neighbors with a big old smile and a plate of brownies. Or cookies. Heck, muffins even. I’m not picky. I just needed that welcome wagon to make me feel like a real homeowner. So I waited. The weekend went by. I waited some more. I thought, “Well maybe they are just giving us time to get settled in.” I kept waiting. Surely they would come, right? Every show I had ever watched displayed the wonderful welcoming of new homeowners in the neighborhood. It was about to be my turn and I couldn’t wait!!! Well folks…here I am on my fourth week in this house and guess what? Still no welcome. Still no wave from across the street while watering their lawn. And especially still no treats.

What is wrong with this world? Please believe that the moment someone moves into this block from here on out, they WILL be getting cookies from me. Why? Because that is the decent, neighborly thing to do. Maybe not in this crazy 2010 world but the inner June Cleaver in me wants, nay needs, to welcome people in a proper fashion. But apparently I am the only one on this block that feels that way. I guess that’s what you get for living in the past.

I guess I’m off to buy a wii or a flat screen TV or something. You know…to get with these new times. I wonder if the man from Best Buy will appreciate my thank-you note for his wonderful sales service.

7 Quick Takes

1. I (Molly) am in Vegas on business. Therefore, no/delayed blog posts. John is apparently "busy" taking care of our baby as a single dad. Whatever!

2) While in Vegas, I saw a man holding the hand of his 4 year old son while wearing a shirt that had an arrow pointing to his babymaker that read, "my better half" Father of the year?

3) you know how sometimes you see clothes on hangars at stores and think, "who would EVER wear this?" Girls in Vegas, that's who. I saw so many buttcheeks poking out from under teeny tiny short dresses and boobs overflowing from tops and see-thru clothes. It was insane!! I think I fit in real well with my long jeans and button up tops with pearls and David Yurman.

4) Auntie Annie pretzels just don't taste as good as they do when I eat them with my momma and sisters.

5) I am going to an Oriental Expressed party tomorrow (ask the google). John is not happy about this. I am. Jack's cuteness is about to skyrocket.

6) there is no better airline than southwest.

7) happy weekend!!! I am in the airport and on my way home to my boys! I can't wait to smell that jack and hold him and kiss him. I am kind of crazy about him. His dad ain't bad either.

I’m No Stylist

This is my hair:

Pregnant? Same hair:

Formal? Same hair:Lawyer? Same hair:

Bridal? Same hair:

Disgusted? Yep. Still the same hair:

This straight, side-swiped bangs look has been going on for quite some time now. I got these little side-swiped bangs my sophomore year of college and I never looked back. It’s like that episode of Seinfeld where Elaine’s “delicate genius” friend has the same hair for years on end. That’s me.

CORRECTION: That was me. You see, a couple weeks ago I got a haircut. A brilliant haircut by a brilliant stylist. Then last week I was reading a contract. There I was with my side-swiped bangs reading and reading and reading, thinking, “Heck no you cannot assign without giving us prior written notice” and “Absolutely not will we go for a nonreciprocal hold harmless!” when it hit me: my bangs were annoying the heck out of me. How in the world could I read about indemnification when my bangs refused to stay behind my ear? My solution? No, don’t look in your drawer for a bobby pin! Instead, walk over…CLOSE your office door…pull out your office scissors…and go at it. Before I even had time to think about it, there I was holding the scissors thinking, “I just need to make them a smidge shorter so that they won’t be in my eyes. I’ll just cut them at an angle just…like…so….oh. Oh my. Oh my goodness. What have I done?”

The end result looked a little something like this:

I had one side that was way shorter than the other. I was, in short, an idiot. I immediately texted Ashley and told her she MUST come over and fix them. She was sweet enough to come to my house Saturday morning and do her best. The only problem was that I had cut them at such a blunt, and uneven angle that they had to just get shorter. The result now resembles this:Short, funky, layered bangs a la Alyssa Milano. The only difference here is that I am no Melisa Milano. I am a lawyer who works with people that are all twice my age and who do not understand why I would want to make myself look even YOUNGER than I already do. Hello sore thumb, how nice to see you in this office!

Oh well. So I look like a 12 year old for a couple weeks. Right? So people mistake me for Jack’s babysitter instead of his mother. Who cares if people think John is taking his little sister out to dinner? So someone thinks I am just hanging out in my dad’s office while he is down in the break room getting coffee. No big deal. I’ll live. Just don’t count on this being the next Molly hairstyle. I’ll have those side swipers back before you know it. And this time, they’re here to stay!

Ten on Tuesday

For each of the following 10 categories, tell us which brand/product you use and why.
1. Cell Phone: Apple.  I enjoy touching the screen.
2. Email: Gmail.  I like the long list.
3. Toothpaste: Whatever is cheapest.  It’s the cheapest.
4. Car: Honda Accord.  Quality, quality, quality.
5. Writing Utensil: Huh?  A pen.  I like to click pens.
6. Lotion: ummmmm
7. Interior Paint: What? What are these questions?  I’m so confused.
8. Soda/Drink: Diet Coke… and the word it Pop, not soda.  C’mon southerners.
9. Laundry Detergent: Tide.  I enjoy the Ocean.
10. Medicine: What are you trying to say?  I’m some sicko?!?

Poo in Blue

You might have seen the commercial.  There’s a brand of diapers that is running a limited edition… where there’s a blue jeans print on the diapers.  If not, you need to see the commercial:

 

When I first saw these… I thought they were ridiculous.  Then the more I saw them, they started to grow on me.  Then Molly said that she needed to get some… because when you have a baby you can put him in whatever you want and he can’t complain.

Well, I caved and bought some.  And then we made Jack look ridiculous:

(he wore them right after his 4 month shots… hence the bandaids.)

And for the record… he did not poo in blue.  He did pee though.

Seven Quick Takes

1) I have lost a box. It is driving me bonkers. I cannot find Jack’s (nearly completed) Baby Book, the cross that hung in his room, about 3 pairs of John’s jeans, and a few other random things. THIS IS DRIVING ME CRAZY! We are totally unpacked so the only thing I can think is that the box somehow got lost. How is that even possible? and WHY did it have to lose his baby book?? The one with all the mementos (heartbeat/contraction strip, hospital bracelet, ultrasound pictures, etc.) already in it? UGH. I get inner rage every time I realize that it’s STILL lost.

2) I am not biking the US for MS. Nope. Not even biking the block for Calorie Burning. Nothing. Yet when I see people on Facebook talking about the MS150 or something, I can’t help but think, “150 miles? Ha! You wimp! My baby sister is biking from Virginia to California to kick MS butt.” Hey, Molly—go ride 150 miles and THEN say it’s a wimpy thing to do. But yeah, you’re right. Your sister does kind of rock.

3) Speaking of…in case you are interested in her ride: http://www.bridgetbikesusforms.blogspot.com/ Pay no attention to the “where we are” thing. It once said she was in Canada going 156 MPH. I think it may be a little off.

4) WHERE IS THAT DAGUMMED BOX?!?!?!?!

5) On Wednesday, I was talking to my mom and I said something she didn’t like. She said, “I am going to hurt you in the face!” Not the exact wording I use, but this is not good! Now I have my dear, sweet mother developing this terrible habit too!

6) I got an iphone! Since John’s turned into a brick when he decided to go swimming with it, he had to order another one. He bought one for cheap from a friend at work who wanted to replace it with the new iphone. Then John got the new iphone. Which means now I have one! An old one…but who cares! Now I can check twitter more than once a day. And YES. This is exciting to me.

7) We stopped rice cereal on Sunday after Jack seemed to be having some complications from it. We have given him 4-5 days to get it out of his system and he is doing much better. We gave him some more last night so this weekend should be the test: if he starts acting fussy and crampy again, we know that he is allergic to rice on top of everything else.  Oh gracious I hope he is not. He’s already allergic about half the foods out there. Not rice too!

Have a wonderful weekend! Ours is busy busy which is not good. I hate busy weekends. But whatever, at least it’s the weekend.

Can I Blog About This?

As was abundantly clear from Monday’s post, I am beginning to run out of things to blog about. Even if I DO find something to write about, it’s usually pretty boring. I mean, yes, our weekend was pretty crappy. But nobody aside from us and perhaps Shayla would care. Yet here I am feeling some ridiculous need to tell the entire blogging world about my sick husband and child and a missed opportunity to drink Salty Dogs with the girl who once shared my love of all things Zenon: Girl of the 21st Century.

So needless to say, if something comes along that I think may make for a blog topic that people will actually give two hoots about, I want to remember it. But here’s the deal: apparently not everyone wants you to blog about the mundane details of their lives. Apparently it’s bad form to just write about the funny things people did. So I have gotten into a new habit of being sure that I ask first before sitting down and typing all about my friends and family.

For instance, on Sunday night we went over to dinner at my parent’s house. My sister and her husband (and Jack’s identical cousin) were there. My dad made a comment about Browyn (that’s my sister, keep up here people!) feeding her son. Then I said something about when I was nursing Jack. He replied, “Yeah, didn’t you do that for like a week?” Well, you all know what a touchy subject it is with me that I couldn’t nurse longer. So this little joke was not very funny to me. My response, “I’m going to murder you.” TO MY FATHER!!! I told him I was going to murder him. WHAT.THE.HECK?!?!?! These violent things MUST stop coming out of my mouth. Anyway, the point is that my sister said, “This is exactly what you were talking about on your blog! (<—click) You’re supposed to say, ‘Do you want fries with that?’” I looked at her puzzled and said, “What? No. That’s not my new phrase. I joked that I’d have to say that because I was going to get fired from my job.” It was like a light bulb went off. Her eyes got wide and she replied, “Oh!!! That makes so much more sense! I was wondering…here I was thinking you had to go around saying, “Do you want fries with that?” all the time to break yourself of that habit.” We all had a good laugh and I immediately thought, “Hmm…all my readers (all 3 of them) would think it was funny that a) I said an offending phrase again and b) that Browyn didn’t realize that my fries line was a joke. I immediately asked, “Can I blog about this?”

Later on that night, we were talking about the 30 Day Shred. My sister brought her copy from Omaha and my mom asked if she could borrow it. Browyn said yes and mom immediately informed us that “someone will have to teach me how to use the VCR.” I said, “VCR? Is it a VHS?” Mom said, “No no. Not the VCR. The CD player. So I can do the DVD.” Typing it out now I realize it’s not as funny as it was in real life. But that’s not the point. The point was that the next thing out of my mouth (thank goodness it wasn’t something violent) was, “Can I blog about this?”

Throughout the evening, things kept happening that I thought would just be hilarious blog reading. I kept asking, “Can I blog about this?” See, it’s polite to ask before blogging about other people. You should always ask first. I suppose the next step would be respecting their answer.

Homeowner’s Paradise

What is the paradise of a homeowner?  Some would say, it’s to never own a home again.  Why else do you think retirement communities exist?  However, for a new homeowner, the paradise is the home.  I’m not gonna lie, there are definitely times when I would look at others my age and think, “Why the heck do they have a house? I don’t have a house.”  Clearly, I should have been working a lot harder to get a house quicker.  Well, that’s all done now, because I own a house.  For a cheapo like me, it’s not the easiest thing I have ever done.  I enjoy holding onto money and homeownership really sucks it out of you quick.  I digress from the true point of this post though… and that’s to show some pictures, which people wanted…

The Kitchen

The Dining Room (we’re trying to find chairs for the table… so if you know where to find some good cheap chairs, please let us know.)

The Living Room

The Hallway

The Master Bedroom

The Master Bath

Our Closet (For Some Reason Molly Wanted This in The Pictures)

 Jack’s Room

 The Guest Bedroom

The Guest Bath

The Same Hallway As Before

The end.  I’ll post pictures of the other 5 bedrooms tomorrow.

Ten on Tuesday

1. What is the worst movie you have ever seen?

Oh gosh! That horrible one with Robert Downey, Jr. and Tom Cruise and a few other famous people. They were actors in a jungle. And there was ridiculous gratuitous violence.  It came out about 2 years ago. HORRIBLE!

2. Do you have a favorite Disney/Pixar film?

Toy Story. Hands Down. In my mind, there IS no other Disney/Pixar film. Although Finding Nemo was pretty cute. But no…Toy Story it is.

3. Do you have a favorite movie from the 80′s?

80s movies are the best movies out there. I stand by that. Can’t Buy Me Love is probably my favorite.

 
4. Are there any movies you saw more than once in the theater?

My Best Friend’s Wedding. I think that’s the only one. And I only did that because I saw it once with my sister and then a group of friends was going to it and invited me and the boy I had a crush on (his name was, I kid you not, “Woody”) was going. He ended up not showing up and I ended up blabbering and ruining the end for my friend, Izzy, because I told her, “I still can’t believe they don’t end up together” about an hour into the movie. Well done 8th grade Molly. Well done!

5. What is one city/area of the US (or country you live if you do not live in the US) that you have not seen but would like to see?

Maine. I really want to go to Maine for some reason. Probably because I want to make myself sick eating absurd amounts of lobster.

6. What are your favorite toppings on an Ice Cream Sundae?

Ask me again when I am pregnant with Jack’s brother or sister. That’s pretty much the only way you’re going to get me to eat an Ice Cream Sundae.

7. How many proms did you go to? What color was your prom dress? If you went to muliple proms, what color was your favorite prom dress?

Womp Womp Woooooomp. I never went to my own prom. Sad, I know. I just wasn’t cool enough I guess. I did go to prom in 9th grade with my then-boyfriend Matt Rolling (Father Rolling now). But that wasn’t my prom and I had barely hit puberty yet so I am not sure if it counts. Oh how I wish I had a picture of that. I had this HUGE hair and pale purple dress. Oh man. It was awesome!

8. Is there a sport or extra-curricular activity that you didn’t get to try as a child that you wish you would have? (e.g. gymnastics, piano lessons, ballet, etc.)

Not really. I was am pretty lazy. I did soccer and was really bad at it. I did piano lessons and never practiced. I was a decent swimmer until I hit aforementioned puberty and refused to get in the water the first time I got my period. I did dance but I wasn’t all that good (even though my awesome hand pose and sweet polka dot number would give you the idea I was the next dancing queen):

So yeah, I tried some things. It didn’t work out. So I learned my lesson: give up!

9. How many siblings do you have? Are you the oldest, middle, or youngest?

I have 3 sisters and one brother. My parents had a perfect family with one girl (Meghan) and one boy (Willy). Then my mom’s brother died and she wanted to have a child and name it after him so Browyn Miller came along. Then my parents forgot how to use birth control and me and my baby sister came to be! Accident kids are the best, just in case anyone was wondering. 

10. Do you feel like you fit in with your age group? Or do you feel younger/older than your age group?

In my career, I am by far the youngest person other than interns (though my current intern is older than me and that makes me feel totally uncomfortable sometimes). So I guess I feel older than my age group in that sense. Otherwise, I think I’m fairly on par. Though I am only 25 and I already am married and have a kid. Seeing as how my “plan” was to get married at 28 and have kids at 30, I guess I am a bit off on that too. And then there’s the fact that I tell people I want to punch them in the face…so I guess that makes me about 6 years old.

What a weekend!

John and I were supposed to go to Houston this past weekend. We had been planning this trip for months—since before Jack even arrived. We were going to visit my childhood bestie, Shayla, and her husband at their new home. We were going to catch a Cardinals/Astros game and have a gay old time!

Instead, Jack got sick on Thursday. He was having trouble shaking a little tummy issue (it’s hard to tell whether he’s actually sick or if it’s just his GERD sometimes) and we decided to stay home after he kept waking up on Thursday night screaming in pain…we think from the cramps he was having. We were super bummed about not getting to go since we were so looking forward to it. But boy howdy, was it a good thing we stayed home. On Friday, Jack got his 4 month immunizations. He was in pain (and let us know it) all day. Then Friday night, a work issue popped up and I was on the phone/computer for a good few hours. On Saturday, John woke up sick. Had we been in Houston, I think it would have been dreadful. It was already bad enough being home.

Anyway, glad to report that all is well now…aside from the fact that we are bummed out about missing our long-awaited trip. Now we are BACK in the planning stages of getting to Houston. Which is harder than it may sound. That friend of mine is one popular little lady! We’re trying to snag a weekend before she’s all booked up. Don’t worry blogoworld, I won’t tell you when we’re going. I don’t need you coming and robbing my house of our 24 inch Target off brand TV or our 5 year old non-flat screen. And don’t even get me started on those hand-me-down couches and tables you want. Yeah, I know my great wealth makes me a target. So instead I’ll just let you know how great of a time we have AFTER the fact. I’m smart like that.

Wow. This was an extremely boring blog post. Yet I just spent time writing it so I don’t want to delete it. Perhaps this is why I have 65 readers and no comments. I can’t blame you folks, really I can’t.

Seven Quick Takes

1) Jack has his 4 month appointment today. On Sunday, he will be 18 weeks. On Wednesday, (the 7th) he was 4 months For you math whizes out there, 18 weeks divided by 4 weeks in a month = 4.5 months. This is all very confusing to me. 2 weeks is a long time in the life of a baby. So do I go by weeks or is it time to start going by months when referring to his age? I feel like saying he is 4 months is shorting him one ninth of his life!!!

2) Jack has two, count em TWO teeth! For the record, that is two teeth on a 4 month/18 week old who stands up ALL.THE.TIME and mimics the sounds we make and grabs at things and holds his arms out for us to pick him up and laughs when we tickle his armpits. WHY IS MY SON’S LIFE ON FAST FORWARD?!?!?!

3) Has anyone out there ever had a salty dog? They are pretty much my favorite. Just FYI.

4) We got an awesome dining room table but now we need some chairs to go with it. Some cheap chairs. That still look nice. Suggestions?

5) Jack takes naps on his stomach and sleeps VERY well when he does. But those SIDS people have me so freaked out that I can’t stand to let him sleep on his tummy at night. I don’t get a wink of sleep if I do. So I swaddle him still and he can’t move around when he’s in that thing. But during the day, he sleeps in his clothes and rolls onto his tummy and sleeps like an angel. I, of course, watch his every breath like the neurotic mother I am. His nanny does the same thing. She pulls her rocking chair in his room and watches him and reads a magazine. Have I ever told you how amazing this woman is? We are so SO lucky.

6) John really needs to change our pictures on this blog background. I do NOT look like that anymore and there’s not a single picture of Jackaroo.

7) weekend, weekend, weekend!!! Nobody warned me that it’s not as fun to have a weekend when you are a homeowner and have boring things to do like mow the lawn and clean the gutters. Nevertheless, WEEKEND WEEKEND WEEKEND!!!

The Greatest Show On Earth

Some might say it’s that circus.  Others might say Lost.  However, as much as I love Seinfeld and Lost, there is just something special about ABC’s Wipeout.  I’m not saying it’s better than Seinfeld… I’m saying it’s… specialer or something.

Have you never watched Wipeout?  Then shame on you and may God have mercy on your soul.  (A bit dramatic, but one must be dramatic in situations like this.)  The point of Wipeout is to make it to the end of the course as fast as you can.  Beyond that, you just have to see it to understand it…

Those are the Big Balls.  It’s a Wipeout staple! 

Anyway, it was to my great joy and amazement that when I was watching Wipeout the other day, my son became very interested.  He would not take his eyes off the show. 

Jack was amazed at the Big Arms:

As am I Jack… As am I.

How to Lose Your Job

You know how you get in the habit of saying certain phrases? My sister’s bestie always says “real”…”that’s real cool” or “she’s real pretty.” John says, “So…” all the time…”I’m going to a meeting later so….” “I am pretty hungry so….”

When I was in law school, I said “Fair enough” all the time. Now? Now that I am a big, mature attorney I say things like, “I’m going to punch you in the face.” That’s right: someone says something that I can’t believe or that surprises me and I say, “I’m going to punch you in the face.” WHAT?!?! This is not okay. You know what else is not okay? When the following conversation takes place:

 

Big, Important Attorney Boss: “Molly, did you get my email about the Women in the Law conference coming up?”

Molly: “Yes. That could not sound more boring.”

Big, Important Attorney Boss: “I’m going to sign you up to be a speaker at it. I know how much fun you’d have.”

Molly: “You better shut up or I’m gonna punch you in the face.”

 

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

This really needs to stop if I intend to remain employed.  I have made a point to try and stop saying it. My mom told me something the other day and I thought, “Don’t say that stupid phrase just because you’re surprised!” Suddenly, out of my mouth came, “Shut your filthy mouth!” Other culprits include, “I will stop your heart.” People, these are real phrases that are really coming out of my mouth. What in the world is wrong with me? I’m a nice, Christian young woman. Why am I so violent simply because I am taken off guard or surprised? Needless to say, I have already started practicing my new phrase, “Would you like fries with that?”

Ten on Tuesday

1. If given the opportunity, would you choose a mediocre job that paid well or your dream job that paid poorly?
It would depend on what “paid well” was and what “paid poorly” was.  I did my dream job for awhile and it didn’t pay well, but there were other problems with it too.  Now, I’m in a job that I love and it allows me to live well… so I’m a happy guy!

2. What is your favorite thing about the 4th of July? (For the foreigners: What is your impression of the 4th of July?)
In Omaha, I love watching and listening to all the fireworks.  There are thousands going of all at the same time.  You really haven’t experienced a fourth until you’re in a large town where fireworks are legal.  It' sounds like a warzone.  Not that I’ve ever been in a war zone… I just imagine it sounds similar.

3. What’s the most random fact you know about American history?
2% of Americans died in the Civil War.  In terms of today’s population, that would be 6,000,000 people!

4. What is the best fireworks display you’ve ever seen?
There was this time I was on the planet Mars and they had just gotten a shipment of fireworks from China and they accidentally set them all of at the same time.  Let’s just say the red planet was really red that day!

5. Who taught you how to put on makeup?
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU IMPLYING!!?!?!??!

6. Have you ever gone through a financial planning process? Tell us about it.
No.  And if I did, they wouldn’t ask me a question about me putting on makeup. 

7. What was your favorite outfit as a kid? Bonus points for pictures.
I loved being naked.  I remember running around the grocery store naked once.  Then the cops came.  Click on this link if you want to see a picture.

8. Do you prefer a beach, lake, swimming pool, or no water?
I like Tide.  I always mess up bleach and get it on my clothes.  What?  BEACH?  Oh… watch your mouth!

9. Do you recycle? If not, why?
We’re starting now.  We got a big blue bin!

10. What are your thoughts and feelings about the Twilight Saga?

Oh man!  Where do I start?!?  This is the book about vampires who really aren’t like vampires.  Twilight vampires don’t die in sunlight… they sparkle.  They can also drink animal blood instead of human blood.  They also don’t turn into bats, but instead can have special powers like mind reading.  They also sleep in normal beds and not coffins.  Twilight Vampires aren’t real vampires.  Further, it’s ridiculous that Edward, the main character in the Twilight novels, is a pedophile and the two are in an abusive relationship.  Edward is actually 100-something years old and Bella is in high school.  He also gives his girlfriend bruises and hurts her, which she brushes off by saying, “He didn’t mean to…” and “He loves me.”  Wow.

iPhone + Water = Brick

Molly has a problem.  That problem is her phone.  The problem is always her phone.  A few years back, we decided it was time to get new phones and replaced hers.  Well, we replaced hers with the worst phone on this planet. Ever since then, she’s continued to have the worst phone on this planet.  Our conversations usually go something like this:

Molly: HI!
John: Hi!  How are you?
Molly: What?
John:  How are you?!?
Molly: What?
John: Hello?
Molly: Can you hear me?
John: Yes.  I can hear you, can you hear me?
Molly:  Can you hear me?
John: Yes.
Molly: Good. I can hear you too!
John:  Hello?
Molly: Hello?
John: Can you hear me?
Molly: Yes.
John: Can you hear me?
Molly: Yes. Can you hear me?
John: Hello?
Molly:  UGH!  <click>

Anyway, the new iPhone came out and I have thoroughly enjoyed my first iPhone.  Therefore, it was time to upgrade, so I was going to get the newest iPhone and give Molly my faithful iPhone for her enjoyment and for our sanity.

Then this happened:

This is Jack swimming.  He loves to swim.  This is Jack in his new floaty toy.  He loved his new floaty toy:

I was on my way to the pool.  I was carrying stuff and decided to keep my phone in my swimsuit pocket.  When I reached the pool, Jack was in his new toy and was really digging it.  Therefore, I jumped in with my camera (the camera did not get wet and still works) and then 15 minutes later and basically after I had taken all of these pictures:

…I realized my phone was still in my pocket.  It’s an iPhone and therefore no way to take the battery out.  There’s water behind the glass touchscreen… it’s ruined.  Now our conversations will continue to be ridiculous and poor Molly will continue to use her terrible phone.

Ten on Thursday

TEN ON THURSDAY!
Our internet is down because AT&T hates us and refuses to come fix it
even though we had an appointment for them to come out between 4 and 9
PM!!! That's late people! And they didn't show. Anyway, so the blog
suffers. But here you go...a few days late.

1. What was/is your favorite live action (meaning not animated) kids movie?
Oh man! Those Fairy Tale Theater ones. I LOVED those! ESPECIALLY Jack
& The Beanstalk. ("Wellllllll.....Allllllllllriiiiiiiighhhhhht")

2. What is a bad habit you have? Are you working on breaking it?
I'm a picker. I know it's gross but I am. If I have a zit, a bug bite,
a scab...I pick at it. It's sick. And no, I'm not really working to
break it. I should. It's sick.

3. Describe your father in 3 words.
Generous. Brilliant. Bubbles.

4. Which character in the Breakfast Club were you most like in the ’80s?
I guess Molly Ringwald? But probably only because our names are both Molly.

5. Name 5 songs you know ALL the lyrics to.
Pretty much all songs by DMX. And no, I am not kidding.

6. Do you make pancakes from scratch or a box mix?
scratch. And I do so very poorly.

7. What was your worst job ever? Why?
Two words: China Harbor. I used to be a hostess there. Ah yes, I
remember that....day.

8. What was your favorite class in high school?
Government. Solidified my desire to be an attorney. LOVED it.

9. Favorite summer guilty pleasure?
Sitting on the porch listening to the rain.

10. Please share your best money saving tip!
Plan dinner meals for the month. Then buy all at once and you can
double up on things and save a ton of money. Also, budget budget
budget!

I’m easily amused…

.