Who's Laughing Now?

There are some things that you should just probably know about us Campbells. For one, we eat the same thing for lunches for months on end. For a long time it was these ramen noodle bowls that had steamed noodles instead of fried. For a whopping 60 cents and 200 calories, we had a delicious, filling, carby lunch. Then we found out that they had 87% of our daily sodium intake. And we suddenly started having salad with grilled chicken and carrots for lunch every day instead. Not our 60 cent bargain but for $3, we get a Costco vat of mixed greens that lasts us all week. Add to it a $10 bag of frozen grilled chicken strips that lasts us 2 weeks and we're doing okay. And before both of those menu options, John had a turkey sandwich and I had wasa crackers with a laughing cow cheese wedge. Have you ever had these laughing cow wedges?

They really are quite strange. Little cheese wedges that don't require refrigeration, taste quite good, and last for months. A bit creepy if you ask me. But anything for lunch that doesn't take much effort or money is a winner for me. So I'd stick a few of these wedges in my briefcase on the way to work on Mondays and slather it on some cardboardish crackers around noon every day. It's a wonder why I ever switched to real food...like lettuce...that actually expires.

For item #2 on the "Things You Should Know About the Campbells" list? Our hands are constantly dry. Constantly. Between washing our hands all the time, doing dishes, washing produce, etc., our hands are always disgustingly dry. We have lotion all over our house, in our cars, in our work bags. You get the picture. The other day, I was walking into work and I reached into my bag to get my security badge thing to buzz into my office. That's when I felt it: the downside of having these little things of lotion all over the place is that every once in a while, one of the caps gets loose and I get lotion all over my blackberry, keys, etc. It's a joy. And that morning I'd realized that yet another tiny bottle of lotion I stole from one of my hotel rooms on a business trip had leaked in my bag. Luckily, I hadn't taken home my computer that night so I wasn't horribly worried. On the contrary, my hands and arms were especially dry that morning because it'd been a bit chilly. So I did what any logical person would do...I began rubbing the lotion into my desert-like epidermis.  Every time I reached into my bag for something else (my blackberry, my office key, etc.), I found MORE lotion. So I'd wipe it in again. At this point, my hands and forearms were pretty well hydrated so I started rubbing the lotion into my elbows and upper arms. All the way from my car, through the parking garage, up the elevator, through my place of business and to my office...every time I reached into my bag and found more lotion, I was a moisturizing fool. As I sat down at my desk, I reached into my bag one last time to pull out my lunch and put my bag away. And that's when I saw it: a little aluminum foil triangle squished underneath of my tupperware. Apparently a laughing cow cheese wedge from a few weeks ago had somehow been hiding in my bag for a while...and this particular morning happened to be the morning that my beloved non-refrigerated dairy wedge got smushed. Smashed. Crushed into oblivion. But the weird thing about it was that the aluminum foil only had a little bit of cheese left on it. So if the cheese wasn't in the package anymore...where was it? 

And that's when I sniffed my hands. And forearms...and elbows...and arms. And got a distinct whiff of....light and creamy swiss. 

Yes, it's good that we have moved away from lunches that can be confused with personal care products. Now here's to hoping that I don't mistake my spinach for a tissue anytime soon. But if I do? Eh, I'll just play the blind card. That or write another really "cheesey" blog post.